I’m going to be on TV!!!! ahhh!!

Its interesting to see how life creates paths that you may not have even dreamed of following and out of nowhere you are.  I often wonder where is this path guiding me, where will I end up?, who will I meet along the the way, will I help others, have I helped others already? whats the purpose of all of this.  
On March 8th 2013 Tijen received an email asking if we would be interested in being a part of a television series, there would be four short stories and mine would be one, all regarding infestation. 
My initial thought was of course this need to be told, people need to become more aware of lyme disease and realize how debilitating and torturous this disease actually is.  I was excited and honored to be part of something so educational.  
Before I was diagnosed with Lyme Disease you would have never in a million years seen me agree to be on television.  I was one who liked the least amount of attention possible & feared to present a school project never mind share my personal story to the world.  It still is very scary and as days became closer a part of me felt like running away (even though I physically couldn’t do that right now) my nerves kept saying RUNNnn!! I was so nervous on sharing my personal story,  concerned on how I would sound, look, even worried that I slouch during my interview, so many thoughts and concerns were running through my mind.  I can honestly say I have never felt so many butterflies in my stomach.  – Thank goodness for ginger and rescue remedy.The day arrived and it felt as though the butterflies in my stomach had tripled they were moving at a million milesbutterflies-in-my-stomach-1024x576_large per hour.  I kept having to remind myself that this is a really good thing and sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone, take chances and separate how I feel at that moment & know that even though I am scared, nervous and want to scream for someone to get me out of here, in the end by me sharing a part of me, may help so many, and even if I only help one person that is amazing.It was time to get ready and of course that was easy, my outfit was already planned, bangs were cut to perfection, shoes were lined up, makeup was done, I felt great!! And then………… I heard a knock at the door, the camera crew arrived at 1 o’clock and my nerves struck back at 1 o’clock,  I felt an initial heat wave strike across my entire body.Breath Ashley tomorrow will come soon enough and this will all be over!164271_10151547846973395_2056884660_n

They were very organized & set up quick,  I was wired up immedietly and waiting to sit in what they called “the hot seat” surrounded by cameras people and a microphone over my head, ahhhhhh!!  now I was reallllllyy wishing someone would be me out of there.  Trying to keep my composure, act natural and be myself, I hear “Frame, Camera, ACTION!!!!!!” really…. they actually say that?….

It began with  say and spell your name……..A few questions started and I felt as though my heart was racing and my body was thinking I was on vacation in the hottest heat possible, (realxxxxx Ashley relax…) in my mind I kept thinking the faster you answer the questions and don’t make a mistake the faster its Tijens turn 😉 but make sure to act un afraid and natural all at the same time.  My confidence started to build… and finally I was done!! I DID IT!!! who would have known… now its Tijens turn to step into the “hot seat”. teehehe..8611_10151548514388395_2127455588_n

The producer came up to me and said “okay now we need you to change into something more homey and remove all your makeup”……..WHAaaaaatt.   I think he noticed on my face that I wasn’t to thrilled about removing my makeup and changing into “grub clothes”, he looked at me and said “is that okay?”… I agreed obviously, and it makes sense because in all honesty I dont wear dresses, nylons a full application of makeup and swarovski earings everyday!.  I went into the bedroom and thought okay I need to find a still somewhat of attractive “homey” outfit and as far as removing all of my makeup maybe if I lose the eyeliner I’ll still look decent and homey all at the same time. I was being sneaky!!…. & I succeeded!! woo…  Tights and a longer black tank top with cute socks, I should dress like this more often I look awfully cute.

Now it was time for us to go outdoors……brrRRRrRr… they wanted to see Tijen and I walking or in my case rolling along side the water, I could see neighbours peaking out of there windows loll!! probably wondering what we were doing and why was an entire camera crew following us, cant balme them really!. Now it was time to go inside and prepare tea, this was super funny, while drinking tea we were told to have a conversation “pretend me arent here”, ahah I soon realized that I am far from an actress, our conversation was “how….was..your day today”,, and me laughing!  I would be better in a scilent film !!

Treatment time =) best part ever! finally I could relax…..or fake relax for the cameras.  Acupuncture, cupping and a heat wrap…….although that was quite interesting, me in my two peice bathing suit with an entire camera crew surrounding me.  Times when you wish  you had a one peice!.

I did it though and I can officially say I concoured one fear =)

Love Ashley

“He who has overcome his fears will truly be free.”
― Aristotle